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Thursday, December 17th, 2009
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ana_mia
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Go me!!! Losing weight! yes. best feeling in the whole world. There's nothing like stepping onto a scale and seeing lower numbers. such a high!!!
CW: 137
GW 120
weight lost so far: 3lbs
Todays intake has included: apple sauce (40), vegan cookie (60?), salad with cucumber and pepper and no fat dressing (100?), candy cane (10)
total: 210 :D
Keep working hard girls! I know you can all do it!!! Stay strong!!
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Friday, December 18th, 2009
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ana_mia
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omg i drank 3 full glasses of saltwater and i think my insides are gonna go on strike soon. it worked, oh it worked. but then i tasted the lemon/cayenne pepper/maple syrup mix that i was basically supposed to live on and i couldn't. if i put food or liquid in my body, it should atleast be worth it. i know i can lose alot of weight, but i've decided to do this my way:
salt water solution in the morning
200g of food and 3 glasses of water durring the day
it obviously won't work like it would if i was doing the master cleanse, but if i drink saltwater solution every morning, something has to go right with this plan.
tomorrow's gonna suck balls though. my friend's coming over in the morning and we're going to the mall, where i'm positive she's gonna wanna eat. so i will probably eat popcorn or something. and that night we're gonna get high so i sooo hope i don't pig out when i get the munchies, although i'm really not confident at this state. maybe i'll be too high to even stand up, hopefully =D
take care
xoxo
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Thursday, December 17th, 2009
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ana_mia
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kay so i am staying on track here today. I had less than 600 cals. I ate:
1/2 banana
1 apple
grilled chicken salad
i weighed 115 this morning and at 8pm i weigh 114 (after dinner) so i am hoping to be 112 tomorrow. I hope; but i will still be happy if i'm 113, i mean not happy happy but happy i'm back down again and then i'll be 3 pounds away from my goal weight instead of 5 pounds. I want to be 110 by my vacation christmas eve i leave for florida. Bikini time. I am in my room upstairs entertaining myself and i will not be going downstairs at all in the kitchen. I ate healthy grilled chicken for dinner so i wouldnt binge and i'm on a new medicine called pristiq combined with lamictal and i am almost weened off my geodon (which was making me eat) so i dont really have the urge to go down and eat. i am in control and it feels great. 6 more days of strict restricting. how are you guys doing??
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Friday, December 18th, 2009
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ana_mia
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Thought i'd start this with a 'hi how's everyone doing !!' I'm a little curious who actually reads these lol as comments are rare lately :P
Anyhow ... down to 65.1kg today ... HOW ?!?! The past 2 days i've done relatively shit, still around 1000 calories but damn how do I keep losing ?! Maybe the fat burners i'm using are working .. and I just bought some more last night yay =)
So yeah that's 143lbs ... down 12lbs in a month. I've reached my xmas goal, so new xmas goal is 64kg =) 140lbs.
Wish I was happier about this, but am rather depressed today =(
Hope everyone is doing well xoxo
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Comments: Read 13 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, December 17th, 2009
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ana_mia
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Nobody seems to talk much in this community. Kind of boring you know? Anyways todays been ok. Burned 280 approximately at work and have only consumed 260. Seems like a large nnumber but i was so weak today. 93LBS still. Had a doctors appointment after work and they want me to admit myself. No. They threaten to tube if i get below 85 but fuck em. How is everyone? TALK for christ sakes its supposed to be a support community. If anyone has any e.d questions or just questions in genenral holla. Im bored and i know too much about this disorder (AN). XxXx Liv
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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This community is so depressing, did you know?
No one write anything funny. Noone even writes about themselves, or their lives.
Its just "boo hoo, I ate too much" allllllllll the time.
Granted, this community was never that exciting at the start, but at least people wrote about their lives, what they were doing, real emotions, other than "waahhh, I'm failing at my psychological disease"
I got a promotion today!!
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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Well, here I am. Sitting hunched over, with all the fat hanging over my pants.
Why? Because I'm a lost fat cause. I should go sit in a cave somewhere where no one can see how morbidly obese I am. Tomorrow I will be going on an oatmeal diet. Oatmeal for breakfast, oatmeal for lunch, oatmeal for dinner.
I was size 4 now I'm size 6, weighed 125, now I dont even know how much I weigh now probably 132-135 or more. All I know is I can pinch 4inches my thighs are the size of the legs of someone who eats at KFC all day (which I dont). and I'm pretty sure If I went swimming the whales would mistake me as one of their leaders.
Liposuction PLEASE!
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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lst time i weighed myself was sunday 12/12, i got home today and weighed my self and i was down 3.5 lbs! i'm 1 lb away from my gw 1 and 6 lbs away from my xmas gw which is exciting :)
so im on day 4 of my fast but technically not cause i had 2 teeny pieces of brocolli last night, but i wasnt too mad about it..i may have to eat tonight, idk, i may be able to get out of it. we'll see how it goes. im nervous for this week, but im just happy to be home for xmas :)
im praying to be my 1st gw tomorrow morning. i took some lax and plan on doing more tomorrow. should get there by tomorrow!!
love you all.
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ana_mia
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Today has been good again, lunch I had corrots and celery (no dip), my girl friends took me out for a pop after school. With them I am just not allowed to have diet pop, so I had a full pepsi!:S still not as bad as it could have been. I've just thrown out my supper...I'm paranoid my mom will figure me out, It's driving me crazy! I've worked out, and now I'm watching "for the love of Nancy" last night I watched "sharing the secret" and "a secret between friends" or something like that. But I never watch till the end. I stop the movie when they get to the recovery part...It's too hard to watch, lol. Anyone know any more good movies?
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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I tried on clothes today, for the first time in awhile...and I had to get a size BIGGER.
I've been eating less than I ever have...even when I was at my lowest weight. Only fruits and vegetables!
I'm not sure what to do anymore. I'm just getting fatter and fatter.
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ana_mia
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My doctor doesn't like the way my new meds are affecting me. But she's going on vacation and trying to refer me to some new doctor. She doesn't want to deal with my shit anymore, even when she comes back.
This is so not a good note to start work on.
Although, 80 cals so far ♥
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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I’m going through a really difficult time right now.
I seem to have these high and low points. For days I’ll be doing great. Happy and eating as little as possible and literally one little thing will go wrong and I’m binging, cutting, and depressed.
8 days until Christmas which means 8 days until my half birthday. I’ll be 16 and a half. This sounds so babyish but if you think about it, that’s 16 and a half years of my life that are gone, over, never coming back. I have 6 more months until I’m 17 and then what?
Without really getting into everything I hate about my life, I’ll just say this is not where I want to be (mentally, physically, emotionally) after 16 and a half years. My life feels so wasted. Like what was the point? Lately I’ve been completely miserable. I’m fucking almost 17 years old and I’ve done NOTHING with my life except mope and be miserable and I don’t want another 17 years like that. I can’t live like this anymore.
So for my half birthday and Christmas (I’m Jewish and catholic, raised Jewish but celebrate a small Christmas for my dad) I want to lose 6lbs.
I could go on and on, but I won’t. I hope everyone is doing well. Xx stay strong <3
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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What was that?
Who just made their first gw?
MEEEEE:D
H-5'0''
W-90!
LW-90!
HW-107
GW1-90!
GW2-88(hopefully by christmas)
GW3-85
GW4-82
UGW-80
BMI-17.6
Oh, happy day:)
I rewarded myself with an apple.
I love all of you and I really really hope today's good for you<3<3
Good luck!
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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ana_circle
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didn't do so good today :( at least i got away with not eating dinner though. today could have been worse but i still didn't drink enough water or do enough exercise eughh. i don't know whats wrong with me, why can't i just get on with it?!!
will try and eat far less tomorrow. i had 1000 today, fml. so i will have under 500 tomorrow.
and i am going to buy some diet pills. and i am going to start living off lots of green tea and diet coke.
new start tomorrow, i can do it.
stay strong, unlike me :(
<3
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ana_mia
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i don't think i even noticed how much i was hurting myself until the middle of my chem final this morning. i didn't feel well at all. i felt like i had to throw up, but i was too scared to stand up and walk to the bathroom. then i decided to try to, and i couldn't stand up. i got in inch off my bench and fell back down.
and then i looked at my hand and my fingers looked huge to me. and i felt like i was puffed up all over and i just lost it. i failed the final. i couldn't focus on anything other than i took way too many pills to counter eating last night and this morning. no more pills until i can use them more responsibly.
my stomach still hurts like a bitch after allergy meds and a nap. and when i get up i completely lose my vision and my balance.
having some tomato soup, i feel a little better i guess. trying to pull a liquid fast until the 23rd still. but i've decided for lunch tomorrow with the grandma if i have normal soup it won't be breaking since i have no other choice. i'll just tell her my stomach hurts, which might not even be a lie.
hope everyone else is doing well.
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ana_mia
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Last night I ate more than I should of :/ And then today.. I was doing well.
at 5am i had a ceral bar, breakfast I had 2 spoonfuls of yoghurt and a foxs cream.. but stil i wasnt doing OVERLY bad. even if that foxs cream was completely the wrong thing to eat.
I then had 80g of mixed vegetables (45 calories) and a boiled egg.. But I then went and ate about 3 cookies, and a peice of french bread. then I went and ate another 2 or 3 peices of that bread...
im gonan say ive proberly had around 1500 calories today. I feel disgusting.
Tomorrow I will fast and exercise like crazy. Im going to go exercise now aswel..
My scales says ive lost weight. but i feel like ive gained.
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ana_mia
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whats the one thing that you are completely afraid of happening with ana's company?
for me i think its the thought of something happening, like me getting in an accident or someting and because of ana's damage on my body not being able to recover and dying..
--todays been fine. finished doing my dads present... and relaxed. gonna go do some exercise, at first i wasnt but then i came here and i want to be able to tell you guys after some time that i was strong enough to get back to my old weight (: you guys really help me alot. <33
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
EDIT at 12:45 pm: I binged. njuwghiuwegnjdsnguwhguwre wtf?! i dont even know.. Im home alone babysitting my 2 youngest sibings and my mom just bought ALOT of good food and you know that feeling when your home alone? lk theres no one watching you.. so i was like.. ok il eat up to 1000 calories and then not eat anything else today. so i counted everything i ate and i ate about 1400 calories..
So i freaked out and drank like 5 big cups of water and went and purged..
Blah. im such a mess. So i purged right after i ate so i think i got everything out.. i sure hope so.
Im making myself some green tea right now i my stomach calms down. I just had another Alli diet pill, so hopefully hopefully hopefully i dont gain tomorrow. its all out right?
When my brother gets home i plan to go to our hall and dance for a few hours to burn some extra calories. and also i plan to take a long walk tonight.
*sigh*
what do you girls usually do when you binge? is this enough? share some tips please!!!!!!!
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ana_circle
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-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
EDIT at 12:45 pm: I binged. njuwghiuwegnjdsnguwhguwre wtf?! i dont even know.. Im home alone babysitting my 2 youngest sibings and my mom just bought ALOT of good food and you know that feeling when your home alone? lk theres no one watching you.. so i was like.. ok il eat up to 1000 calories and then not eat anything else today. so i counted everything i ate and i ate about 1400 calories..
So i freaked out and drank like 5 big cups of water and went and purged..
Blah. im such a mess. So i purged right after i ate so i think i got everything out.. i sure hope so.
Im making myself some green tea right now i my stomach calms down. I just had another Alli diet pill, so hopefully hopefully hopefully i dont gain tomorrow. its all out right?
When my brother gets home i plan to go to our hall and dance for a few hours to burn some extra calories. and also i plan to take a long walk tonight.
*sigh*
what do you girls usually do when you binge? is this enough? share some tips please!!!!!!!
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ana_mia
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Just wanted to say hello to everyone! I hope you all are doing well! Remember, we are in this together. <3 Stay strong beautiful ones. Don't let ANYTHING get in the way of you and your goals! <3
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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i just want to thank the people who commented on my post yesterday about my issues with my mum it rlly ment a lot because i have never talked about it before and it was truely bothering me for a while now. and thanks to all of you for this lovely supporting community u have no idea how much better i feel after talking about things here. it REALLY helps me a lot. thank you all <3
i will do a salt water flush tomorrow but am not sure is it just about drinking 1L of water with two tbs of salt and then u go to the bathroom? and is it only for one day? i am desperate to lose 3 kilos in one week. i dnt think its possible but i have to try my best!!
i will let u guys know abt the salt water flush..
how are you all lovelies doing??? <3
XXX
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ana_mia
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last night my mom came in and said we should clean my room well today since Im getting my wisdom teeth out and people will be visiting. I have ZERO time to clean it today so I bet she'll do it while Im here at school. AND IM SO SMART that I took all my "skinny" books with me. Past and present ones. I just stashed them in my car. Glad I thought about it. I ususally hide my one I write in now under my matress. I think Im going to go to target and get a box that can lock and just keep shit in there.Then I dont have to worry someone will find it.
Yesterday I made sugar cookies and ate like 3 and some dough throughout the day. It was about 10:00opm when I got out our math review and realized that that isnt that bad because thats all i had. Its shitty food, but its all i had. My stomach hurt so bad so I made some soup, i couldnt finish it all. And i was happy about that. Today I've had hot coco (i know.but i had a final so i wanted a little somethin to get my brain goin) and then ill have a hot chai later and then i dont know.
Im going to the gym tomorrow at like 8 am and getting my wisdom teeth out at 11. I just want to workout before for some reason. Cuz i wont be able to all weekend.
Ugh. Finals. Got one more today!Then Im done! Ugh. Wisdom teeth. Fml.
HAve a good day babies!
Love, Me!!!!
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ana_mia
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Hello all. :3 I'm down 1.4 lbs. from yesterday, which is great, but the holidays are coming up and I'm worried. Anyone have any tips for avoiding food during a family gathering?
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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| Posted by: | inthe_rye. |
| Time: | 11:36 am. |
| Mood: | whatever. |
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yesterday i gave in. i had a small baked potato and a cup of green tea.
i really need self control.
fml.
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ana_mia
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had a bowl of captin crunch feel gross
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ana_mia
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Hey girls!
so going on my trip on sat...nervous for the food:(
Im planning a fast for three days...but i get car sick...you think that will be a bad combo?
anyway hope you all are sticking to your food plans, whatever they are, just keep thinking about the after image of yourself and how great it will look!
Love you all
xoxoxoxLastChance123
P.S. email or texting buddy?
  
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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| Posted by: | m1ss_m1sery. |
| Time: | 4:20 pm. |
| Mood: |  accomplished. |
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As of today I'm back to a double digit weight =D
Cw: 98! Yay
Ok so today i decided to eat How many calories as pounds i wanna weigh. So i wanna weigh 80lbs so ate 80 calories:) it's 16:15 here and I'm done for the day...my weak moments usually happen between 11 and 4 o clock so i try keep busy then:) after that I'm fine:)
I put up my xmas tree today and since it's a lot taller than me it ended up being quite a work out Lol:)
Hope you all having good days!
Lotsa hugs!
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ana_circle
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Hey everyone. I'm new. Just introducing myself here. So anyway I've had an Ed since I was 12. I got "better" after this time last year so now I'm fat. Oh, and I'm 24 and live in Pittsburgh pa. If anyine else lives here let me know, it would be great to meet up for black coffee and dry lettuce leaves! Wo0t~*
lw: 92
hw: 155
cw: 155
gw: 105
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ana_mia
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Finally brought myself to post a picture ♥
4'11"
170 lbs.
( ... )
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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ana_circle
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i love this site so much. i think its amazing how we just all come together, not knowing each other but still helping and supporting each other :)
and i love blogging!
its just perfect :)
hope everyone is doing good.
so far i've had a bowl of cereal and i'm not planning on eating anything for the rest of the day. i might have something tiny in the evening. i'm ill atm so it should be easy to get away with not having dinner. and i'm supposed to be going out tonight but i'm not going... all that alcohol bleughhhhh
big kisses
xoxo
CW: 118 :(((
GW: 98
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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so today went well i weighed myself early and was 44.8kgs so 98pounds. then spent all day dreading weigh in binged on chocolate but was soo proud of myself that i kept it in. then went to weekly weigh in and id lost 1kg=2.2 pounds. and got the whole where do u want to be for christmas because we will send u away to a clinic talk. grrr i hate that talk. then i came home and had a huge fat arse binge grr like 3000 cals but kept it in. then went to the gym :( but hating on myself soo bad. 2 day fast as of 2morrow. work tonight :( anyone want to be my beautiful little sweet fasting buddie?
love always and forever
-K-
xxxxx
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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| Posted by: | t0xiccc. |
| Time: | 1:39 am. |
| Mood: |  determined. |
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Day 3 of my fast, check =] If i can keep getting away with it after Friday, i'll be superduper fucking happy.
Anyways, I was looking through some old pics. It's taking me some guts to put em up , but i'll do it. Honest opinions would be great. I think I'll always have huge hips, no matter how much weight I drop ugh >:[
( Pics here, hope this cut works )
I'm still a work in progress , i'll add more in a couple weeks
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Comments: Read 11 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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went 72 hours on my fast exactly. just had some broth and gatorade. but at 12am, i was up studying and had 2 pieces of brocolli which i know isnt a lot but its freaking me out. ugh. im just gonna stop there, fast all today, and see what happens when i get home at 4. i think i can keep it up til sat with just broth and other liquids.
im proud i made it 72 hours though. it just sucks to break it. ya knoo??? :(
i feel so full. i hope i didnt gain, even though i havent weighed myself since sunday and cant til tomorrow.
i think i'll be okay
i just need to go to sleep and get this last final over with tomorrow and go the hell home.
ugh. xmas is still freaking me out and so is this whole upcoming week. im scared.
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ana_mia
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sorry to hog space on here, but i need help plz!!
i've never done the salt water flush but i want to try it and i intend on getting sea salt very soon. i read up on it and i'll drink the mix tomorrow morning on an empty stomach. has anyone tried it? ofcourse i'd LOVEEE to see the numbers go down, but i also have ibs(sorry tmi) but has anyone had any success with the salt water flush? does it actually work or will i just end up puking everywhere? i'm just scared some kind of imbalance will occur or something and i'll, like, die or something. and did anyone actually end up losing any weight?
thanks =D
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
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ana_mia
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Hey Girls & Gents....
I don't know what I should be proud about...
First day of my fast and it has been successful...
The reason why it's successful is pretty sad...
I'm really depressed....
I went to the doctors and she told me I need to lose weight...
Triggered me...
I made my psychiatrist almost cry when I told her I tried to commit suicide by overdosing on my anti-depressants....
I feel like shit....
I threw them back up...
I was lucky...
I don't know if you guys ever had this really specific feeling after a suicide attempt...
part relieved/ part upset for not accomplishing your goal/ part stupid for making your family worry...
it's the worst feeling....
because everyone knows you want to die....
:/
the song that came on isn't helping...
Tears in Heaven -Eric Clapton....
ughh...
:'(
I feel so detached from even my own feelings, including this world...
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Comments: Read 8 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, December 17th, 2009
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ana_mia
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I hate when I'm too hungry to sleep :|
This is my plan for tomorrow:
0 cal - Dunkin Donuts iced tea, plain
120 cal - Apple Walnut Soy Joy
60 cal - 1 serving steamfresh mix veggies
200 cal - pretzel crackers & hummus (if I'm hungry at work)
= 380 for my 400 calorie day :)
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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today i ate-
avocado/tomato/cheese slice/cottage cheese in a mini pita pocket(grilled)-150g
half an individual chocolate piece-10g?
cottage cheese in a mini pita pocket-100g
capsicum/mince/onion/mushroom omlette thing-200g- PURGED
coffee/almond biscotti's-100g
=i purged the omlette thing so i imagine my total weight/intake is about 360grams. 400grams tops.
and i had a shit load of coke zero too. i ate soooo much though!! it was a daily binge, i swear. i know normal people eat more than what i had today. my mum was with me most of today and jesus, she ate much more than me, but she's healthy. she eats healthy and looks healthy. but i'm not healthy and when i try to be healthy i just throw up cos i get scared!!
but i woke up feeling like i should give health another shot today and it clearly didn't work at all. so tomorrow i plan on coke zero/water/200g day...yay
take care every1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
xoxxxxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooooooooooxoxoxoxoxooo =D
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Wednesday, December 16th, 2009
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ana_mia
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Lady's you are all so strong and beautiful, but i need to recover.
i had one of those revelations that i was hoping for, and i finally
got it last night. and today i realized im more than ready to recover
after 2 and a half years. thank you all so much for you support and love
and i will make sure to check in frequently.
i love you all and stay strong
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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ana_mia
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Dear gals,
I'm losing my mind and I'm leaving to go get help. Not food wise but mentally I need a break... I'm gonna continue my dieting but I'm gonna leave for awhile. Merry Meet, Merry Part.
Xoxo! I'll be back when I can.. leave a message for email :)
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